And you thought Batman and Robin were kinky

From CAPTAIN AMERICA #2

Jah, und you all thought zat ze Batman und ze Robin vere ze kinky ones!

Here ve see ze schmutty antics of ze Captain America und Bucky, engaging in activities including ze Cosplay, ze crossdressing, und ze child molestation! Yeechh! Get your cotton pickin' mitts offen der child, Captain! Poor Bucky has become ze warped puppet for ze schtrong und domineering gender-confused Schteve Rogers, who has taken ze liberties mit der little child, making him ze accomplice in ze filthy, schmutty, naughty business!  Comics is indeed schmut!

In Dr. Wertham P. Fredrics perfect world

From MYSTICAL TALES #1

Aaah!

Zometimes, I find ze comic zat chust makes my little heart

  zing mit joy!

Here ve have ze example of vhat life might look like in 

Dr. Wertham P. Fredrics perfect vorld!  

Yes, a vorld vhere I can make ALL ze Naughty Schmutty Dirty parts Disappear --

mit chust saying ze Magic Vords!

Vhat is ze Magic Vords?

"COMICS IS SCHMUT!"

Time to change underwear...times two

From JOURNEY INTO MYSTERY #41

Here ve have ze rare but schmutty medical phenomenon

 known as S.S.E. --

ze Simultaneous Spontaneous Ejaculation!

Notice ze looks of suprise mingled mit  ze shame und disgust, 

as each of zese naughty fellows realizes zey have to go 

und change zere underwear!

Yes, S.S.E. is rare but becoming more und more common, due to the increasing practice of reading ze comic books! Zat is chust ONE of Many side effects! Jah! 

Now you know reading comics vill leave a Stain!

 Yiiuuck! Naughty Schmut!

When is a cannon not a cannon?

From ADVENTURE COMICS #420

Vhen is a cannon Not a cannon?

Vhen it's a PENIS!

Yeesh! 

I don't know vhy Schupergirl has got her Hotpants in a bunch,

but she seems a bit angry as she throws a gigantic Phallic Symbol 

complete mit der Teschticles schtraight at ze comicky book reader!

Maybe she's mad because ze freshly fired cannon just blew a load of cannon balls into her Face!

Zat can upset some womens vhen zey aren't expecting it!

Chust ask Mrs. Fredrics...Er, I mean, SCHMUT!

Compensating for low self esteem

From OUT OF THE NIGHT # 5

Whether it's a business man, a construction vorker, a banker, or a baseball player, men is alvays exaggerating  about ze size of zere manhoods!  Zat, unfortunately, alzo applies to ze Undead! Anyzing to make zemselves feel more important zan zey really are! Please! Who are you trying to fool, us, or yourself?! 

Yeesh! Creepy Schmut!

Earth's smuttiest heroes

From THE AVENGERS #71 (486)

HooBoy! Here ve go Again mit more Schuper Schmut!

You'll vant to wash out your eyes mit der zoap after zis one!

Vhat do schuper-heroes do vhen zey aren't fighting mit ze bad guys? Apparently, engaging in ze schmutty Sex! Here ve see two of ze Avengers, Hank Pym (ze Ant-Man/Giant-Man) und his estranged wife Janet (der Vasp) having ze yicky sex! Ze normal sized Vasp moans mit der orgasmic pleasure, until ve see ze teensy-veensy Antsy-Man crawling up her cleavage, covered mit ze fishy vaginal secretions und demanding she return ze favor! Yeesh! (I von't even mention ze fantasy aspect of zis...zat a man schmaller zan ze gumball can sexually satisfy ze horny voman! Ach! At least give her a taste of ze Giant-Man's dingle-donger, zat would make more zense!) NEIN! Comics shouldn't be showing ze Schuper -Heroes crawling in und out of each others Genitalia! 

It is chust Wrong in Zo Many Vays! Obviously, zis is SCHMUT of der Schmuttiest kind! Naughty, naughty! Tsk, tsk!

Please just make it a quickie

From HIT Comics # 24

Ach Du Lieber!  Vhat in der vorld is going on here? Schtop mit der pumping, already! Too many comics have ze grown man MOUNTED over ze young boy, like zis, und pressing, pressing, Ach, zuch close PRESSING! Nuttin' good can come from zis, I'm telling you! Zat is NOT real C.P.R.!  No, zis type of C.P.R. schtands for "Comics Penis Rubbing"! Yeesh! Und if you think zis is schmutty, be glad I didn't show you ze next scene vhen he tries to dislodge ze object from his throat! HooBoy! SCHMUT!!

Not exactly Richard Simmons...

From WHIZ Comics # 89

These two young boys have been reading too many schmutty comic books! Look, vhatever two consenting adults do, zat's none of my business (Vell, actually, it is), but two boys in a canoe on ze pages of ze comic book, zat's anudder story!  First comes reading comics, zen comes ze "Fagging Out"! Ach! They may not be exactly dressed like Richard Simmons or Ziggy Stardust, but what you CAN'T see is that they are both wearing ASSLESS CHAPS!  No more looking! SCHMUT!!

Ants In The Pants

Didn't I tell you comics vas schmut? Look at zis sex crazed giant ant, clearly mit one thing only on ze mind, ze SEX! He's not looking for food, because zis ant is a vegetarian, und he chust ate! No, zis is a horny giant ant, looking to make ze sex mit der humanoid girl! Und, who can blame him, ze way she is dressed, she is practically asking for it, jah? Put some clothes on next time, you sleazy little schlut! Yeeks! Naughty SCHMUT!

What were they thinking?

Ze Doctor does NOT approve of showing ze sex in ze comics, especially vhen ze sex is between a ROBOT und a GHOST! Especially a little child ghost! Zis robot is making ze angry sex mit der little ghost boy, und ze little ghost seems to like it alot! Yeeesh! SCHMUT!! Schtop looking!